Well, this is truly a fun hobby. Of course I can't get anything to work right, and we all need degrees in computer science, but what the hey?! We try anyway!

Ode To Ye Computer

Online, offline, always so much to do
Looking for this, looking for that
Knowledge, we try to ensue
Search the mail, search the web
Browse the livelong day
Copy this and bookmark that
For surely it is the way
Why do we do these crazy things
Staying up late every night
Ranting and raving, slow downloads
Trying to send megabytes
I think it's a hobby, I think it's a game
I think it's suppose to be fun
But whatever the reason, whatever the plan
I don't think that I've ever won!

By, Shari MacGregor

 

Dear Diana,
How is everything since last we chatted? Seems like yesterday........oh, it was! What fun we are having, huh? Don't you just love these computers?

I'm getting fatter everyday sitting here on my dead butt! Not to worry, I have a wheelchair to roll around in when I get too fat to walk. Doug is a strong guy, he can push me. Yea, that's ok.

Never mind that I'm getting so fat I can't get through the door to get to this computer! I can always move the darn thing outside, this old house doesn't have any heat anyway! If it rains outside, what the hey, it leaks in here too.

I have a novel idea, lets move the #$@%$#^%$ thing into the motor home and I can roll from one end to the other. I can work in the living area on this computer, then roll to the kitchen to fix something to eat, and the bathroom is only one short roll away from the kitchen so I can do my thing there and then the final roll to the bedroom for some sleep.

It is all one straight shot, no turns, no twists, no stairs. I've got it made, Baby!

Wheel chairing is exercise, isn't it? Well isn't it? Of course it is. Once you can get in the durn thing without it rolling out from under you. Then you have to learn to turn around in the space a beetle can.   No problem!   Then if your motor home isn't level you'll have to roll uphill. Ever try that? That's exercise! Yep, think I'll move this puter into the motor home and have me a puter-area-kitchen-eatin-bathroom-peeing-bedroom-sleepin-rollin good time. I will, yes I will!

Love your sis, Shari

 

 


Question...


Where do deleted items go
When we send them to the bin
Are they ever really gone
Or do they still live within

Its a very perplexing question
And no one seems to know
Are they gobbled up in space
Now that would be quite a show

How do they leave my tower
Or are they fried on site
Does anyone have the answer
To my ever wondering plight

I know I can't recall them
As far as I can see
I just want to make sure they're dead
And won't come back bothering me

he he he he he


The Scooter!

There once was a lady from Puter
Who thought she would buy a computer
She went to the store
And looked at a score
But instead she bought her a scooter!

The scooter was red, it looked like it bled
And she couldn't find its dealie
Then she turned around
And what did she found?
It had crashed and lost one of its wheelies

She tried to upright it
But then caught her left tit
Betwixt and between the thingy
It fell with a thud
She looked like a spud
And now her right arms in a slingy

A scooter, no more
Left at somebody's door
She don't give a dang if it hooters
She went back to the store
And looked at a score
And bought her a brand new computer

Now the computer was bad
No more was she sad
She lusted and loved megabytes
And soon she was told
She had to download
If she wanted to see all them sites

She downloaded this and downloaded that
And she watched as the hours were ticking
She stared at the screen
And wanted to scream
But it wasn't her nose she was picking

After all of the hours and all of the days
She sat in a chair and in front of her
Typing in colors and blinking at hues
She stared at her 17 inch monitor

Now the moral of this Quickening
And I'm sure you'll find sickening
Is never upset or excite us
Cause now it is known
has been proven and shown
We all have osteorectumitis!

By (I'm embarrassed to say) Shari MacGregor
6/9/99


I love Alaska
This land that I love
Its loving and dearing
This land that I love!

I love Alaska, its
Mountains high above
Its waters so clear
This land that I love!

I love Alaska
Yes, you love her very
How could you not when
That's all you hear from Shari?






I'm running out of web space fast
But this undertaking has been a gas
You've read words, poems and looked at pictures
I'm fast becoming a permanent fixture
Well, I hope you've enjoyed it as much as me
What will I do next, you just wait and see
And I'll do much better the next time around
Yea, right here on Tripod
It's the best place I've found!



There once was a lady from Kaiser
Who wanted to go see a geyser
She fell on her face
But did it with grace
And now it is spraying beside her.


You have to be really warped to like my humor.


I do write nicer stuff. You'll find it on the poems pages.


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